EdenOne,
I, too, have undertaken considerable scholarly endeavors, I think in an attempt to do the same. Many have tried to make sense of it all by exhaustively studying as many resources as possible, and yet, in the end, come up short. The Bible is an ancient book, with ancient overtones and symbology. The interpretation of its contents is subject to the whims and fancies of modern society, quite similar to the Constitution of the United States or United Kingdom. For this reason, I have struggled, struggled to displace myself from the act of interpreting the Scriptures so as to not bring in my own preconceived notions or ideas, so as to not lend myself to the position of a commentator for whom I hold a particular respect. Through it all I came to the realization that I would like to share with you. It may help you to come to grips with the "really, really, really want to make sure " aspect of your journey.
The early Christian church was defined by, not a oneness in doctrine, but in purpose.
Christ said, "You search the Scriptures because you think they give you eternal life. But the Scriptures point to me!" (John 5:39 New Living Translation)
SOP